Thursday, June 29, 2006

I Made It

Top Five Reasons Why I Am a Mountain Man:

1. I live in the mountains.

2. Large portions of my face have not been shaved for quite a long time.

3. Horses live in my backyard.

4. I have begun to differentiate between North and South, East and West not by the Sun, but by the Mountains.

5. Oh yeah. I live in the mountains.

So there you have it. I am a Mountain Man. You might as well take my picture with a flannel shirt and an axe, and put me on packages of Select-A-Size paper towels. For I am currently making my home just outside of Jackson, Wyoming, and working in a place called Teton Village. It is called this because it is nestled snugly underneath the Grand Teton Mountain Range, which itself makes up the Wyoming branch of an international organization known as the Rocky Mountains.

It took five days and a cross country drive to get here, but it was well worth it. I have never been anywhere like this. The drive, as some of you already know, began in Newton, Massachusetts, and was punctuated by stops in Oberlin, Ohio; Chicago, Illinios; Wall, South Dakota; and, last but not least, Wapiti, Wyoming, just outside the east entrance to Yellowstone National Park (the motel where I stayed in Wapiti is a story unto itself, one which I will tell at a later date). It then took me through Yellowstone, which can only be described as breathtaking, and down through the Grand Teton National Park into Teton Village.

Since arriving, I have been quickly and thoroughly put to work. The hours are long but the work is rewarding, as I am helping put together a summer music festival in what has to be one of the most beautiful places on earth. More will come on my work and the festival later as well, but for now I must sign off. It is enough for today to say that I have made it to my destination, and that this will truly be a summer of Great Breasts.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

You've got it all wrong. Mountain men, while bearded, do not wear flannel or carry axes. Those are lumberjacks, who also happen to be bearded. Mountain men wear deerskin or bearskin. You may be a temporary mountain man, but I am afraid that you may forever be a New Englander...regardless of Houston, Wyoming, or other unnamed places.

Annabell said...

Yes, but do you really want to see Toph running around in deerskin?

Anonymous said...

Well, YES!!

Rivers said...

Please....think of the kittens...err, I mean...

Lambs....

Josh Bisker said...

Your name is not Annabelle. You can tell because "ANNABELLE!" is not something that I can easily picture Matt screaming suddenly and at the top of his lungs through the two floors of our house with the regularity of a very old and precious clock, and the heart-shattering volume of one of those screaming monkeys with the multicolored ass faces.

My secret word is, "chweoydw."

Annabell said...

Shhh...it's my witness protection identity.

Rivers said...

Heart-shattering indeed.

Most of my explosive outbursts can easily be formed into haiku...

"Knock, Knock: Who is there?"
"STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB"
"STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB"

And other gems as well.