I tried Bubble Tea for the first time today.
"Bubble Tea, like, Tea with bubbles?" I asked.
"Sort of. They're little Tapioca balls," Emily replied.
"Oh, Tapioca, okay. Wait, that sounds terrible."
"No, it's really good!"
"Nothing in my 23 years of experience in this world could possibly lead me to conclude that you are speaking the truth."
Okay, so I'm paraphrasing slightly, but you get the idea. I wasn't exactly thrilled with the prospect, but Emily, my housemate, was so keen to see my reaction to her favorite treat that I went along silently. When I entered "Tapioca Express," I half expected to see the walls lined with Jello Pudding Snacks ("Jellllooooooooooooo Pudddddinnnnnnnnnngah!" in Bill Cosby voice). Instead, I saw a menu with about a thousand choices on it, each of which was repeated in Japanese after the English, just in case I wasn't already completely confused. Emily was helpful in that she told me to choose from the "Milk Tea" options, which limited my choices significantly. I asked her what the other options were, and she seemed to have as little idea as I did. Snowball Tea? Disgusting.
There were little cups of the tapioca balls on the counter. "What is tapioca, exactly?" I asked, staring at the black spheres. The only resemblance I could find was to caviar, a substance which I definitely did not want floating in my tea. Little did I know that my question is one of those few fundamental questions which have no answer known to humankind. "Nevermind," I added quickly, fearing that the head of the girl behind the counter was about to explode. Emily ordered Thai Milk Tea, which I guess is essentially Thai Iced Tea with tapioca. I opted for Peach Milk Tea. "With Tapioca?" I was asked.
"But of course."
It was peachy, milky, pleasant at first. Then the small creatures began, of their own volition, to swim up my straw like salmon to the mating ground. I got three or four in my mouth, and before I could react I was chewing. I was drinking and chewing. Remember in grade school when you would try really hard to get good at patting your head and rubbing your stomach at the same time? This is that feeling in beverage form. The tapioca didn't really taste like anything, and wasn't all that unpleasant, just strange and foreign. Overall, it was good. But this is the craze sweeping the nation? Tapioca in your frikkin' tea? I'll believe it when Starbucks starts putting Tapioca in their Frappucinos.
Headline of tomorrow: Starbucks 'Tappucino' Number One Beverage in the Country, in part due to new "I'd Tap That!" ad campaign. In other news, 'Tapiocum' added to Periodic Table of Elements as part of latest efforts to solve the riddle of the origins of Tapioca.
I've decided to be Napoleon Dynamite for Halloween. I already have the "Vote for Pedro" shirt. If anyone has any suggestions for where I can get some boots or glasses, please let me know. Apparently, Halloween is a pretty big deal here at Rice, and I don't want to disappoint with a half-ass costume.
I read this comic a long time ago and loved it, and I just found it again and laughed just as hard. I thought I would share.
OK Bye!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Sup!
I have yet to try the bubbly tapioca tea, though I have heard that it is uh, quite unique. Because you inquired, I thought I would pass along the much guarded secret of the origins of tapioca, handed down, generation... Nevermind. It just comes from a root- possibly of a plant with the same name.
Any ideas of Halloween costumes for me? Going off your idea from last year, I for a few fleeting seconds thought of being Erkle (sp?) but two things prevented this. 1- no one in Japan would have any idea who I was. 2- Even I would become unbearably irritated within 2 minutes. (maybe less- depends on intensity of snort). But I think you should encourage someone else with incredibly low self esteem to pursue this costume choice.
Al
Allison is correct, tapioca does come from a root. And--this is the best part--if you eat the root raw, it will kill you.
Bill Cosby never said anything about this.
bubble tea is awesome, i don't care what you say. don't make me drag you there again...no, in fact, dammit, we are going again, and you're going to try an actual tea flavor instead of an overly sweet fruit flavor and you will love bubble tea in all of it's snot-ball glory.
Post a Comment